This article is complete satire. All information and interviews below are fictitious and provided for entertainment purposes only.
Beginning in fall 2024, the Howard Tilton Memorial Library will begin a project to reclassify several classic books as “queer” literature, Tulane University announced. The project, named “Yaasifying Fitz” after F. Scott Fitzgerald, is Tulane’s latest equity, diversity and inclusion initiative.
The idea came to librarian Evie Rose last year when she relisted books and found a copy of The Great Gatsby. In this book, a reader circled the names of Nick Callaway and Jay Gatsby.
“At first, I was confused. Apparently Gatsby and Nick were very good friends, so I thought it was a tribute to platonic friendship. But as I started flipping through the book, I noticed more hints of annotations There is something beyond Plato between these two characters.”
Ross found several notes in the interaction between Gatsby and Callaway that read “Historians would call them best friends”, “Dude is really in love???”, and in Gatsby ‘Homophobia’ at the time of Tsby’s death [sad face]. ”
Ross began to think of other classics that might have a slightly odd tinge.
“My favorite book is The Iliad, which can be read as gay when I think about it! It’s a revelation. I’m wondering why no one is talking about this! I do feel like the project is gay Pioneer of rights, but I mean, it’s my duty as an ally, you know?”
Soon after, “Yaasifying Fitz” was born, and a committee of teachers and students was formed. The goal of this project is simple, to celebrate the queerness found in much of the classic literature and to make this campus as queer-friendly as possible. So far, the committee has compiled a list of several books included in this reclassification.
In addition to The Great Gatsby, other books include Rebecca, The Catcher in the Rye, and Little Women. Initially, the committee considered including contemporary works such as Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, but ultimately decided against it.
“Yes, Prisoner of Azkaban is super gay, I just realized after reading a bunch of articles fan fiction. However, we do have to draw the line somewhere in this project. If we include everything, it becomes unmanageable. “
Although the project has received strong government support, Ross has encountered some financial problems. While the project appears to require little to no funding, the library does have big plans.
“We planned to build this gorgeous rainbow bookshelf to display the books on the first floor. Initially, we didn’t have the funds to do it. But then I remembered that the book that inspired it all had words in it, and that was vandalism. So We fined the kid who did it $1,000 and put it on the shelf.”
After securing funding, the project was due to be completed in the fall of 2022, but continued severe weather delayed the project. “You know, they’re books, so we couldn’t risk moving them in the rain, which unfortunately really held us back.” Part of the funding for the project was used to buy book covers to protect against future severe weather.
President Mike Fitts expressed fervent support for the project, claiming that the first floor of the library will now be a truly fair place.
“We draw a lot of differences between what you know as straight and gay. But we’re all gay… Homo sapiens,” Fitz said with a wink. “This project really celebrates our similarities more than anything.”
As of now, Duran has no plans to buy more literature from openly queer writers. “We think it’s pretty much the same as supporting queer writers, and it’s more cost-effective. Maybe if more students donated to our Give Green campaign, we’d have more money to support the LGBTQ+ community,” Phil said. Z said.
“Yaasifying Fitz” will launch in fall 2024 and will be open to the public.